“It’ll have you believing that the only way you can complete your creative journey is if you do it this way – no breaks, no fun, just suffering.”
Author Nicola Jackson and life coach Teresa Wilson tell how to tame the Tyrant Gremlin
So, you’re writing and it’s going well. You’re getting hundreds of words down and plenty of hours in. You’ve really committed to your creative journey. You’re loving this amazing feeling and you never want it to end. This is a wonderful time. But it’s also a tricky one.
Because this is the point at which we are most vulnerable to the Tyrant Gremlin.
The Tyrant Gremlin particularly preys on ambitious and dedicated writers. It knows that there’s little chance of persuading you to give up – it can see that steely look of determination in your eyes – so this Gremlin takes another tack. It’s going to manipulate that commitment, making it so that your creative road trip is one long, arduous, painful slog from which there is no respite.
Sound fun? No, thought not. But if Tyrant Gremlin gets its way, it’ll have you believing that the only way you can complete your creative journey is if you do it this way – no breaks, no fun, just suffering. And because you have perhaps been led to believe that nothing good can come unless it really hurts, it’s easy to let Tyrant stay at the wheel and trust its bloody-mindedness to get you to the end of the project. No matter if you are a drained, dried out husk of a person by the time you get there…
WHY THE TYRANT GREMLIN IS SO PERSUASIVE
Why, you might ask, are we so keen to suffer? Why would we want to make the journey in this punishing and painful way if we could do it in a light, breezy, and laid-back fashion?
Well, for one thing, you may have noticed that we humans hate ambiguity and love certainty. We like things to be absolute, black and white. You can witness this in the realms of diet, caffeine or alcohol. Very often, we’re either on the wagon or we are off it. We’re either indulging ourselves to our heart’s content, or we have sworn off and are feeling very pious and self-satisfied. We love to know where we are. Who we are. Things feel easier that way.
What does this mean for our creative projects?
If we appear to be making progress with our writing, then we may start to get scared. What if we can’t keep it up? What if this is just a phase? How can we make damn sure that this burst of enthusiasm or success with writing lasts? How can we be like this all the time?
That’s when we try to control it. But the thing about true creativity is it can’t be controlled. In fact, we believe that true creativity is sort of the opposite of control. It won’t respond to our desperation, to our rigidity, to our neediness. Creativity doesn’t exist to serve us, it wants to play with us.
And while creativity loves nothing more than your heartfelt commitment to nurturing your art, as soon as you start to make harsh demands of it, asking it to meet impossible deadlines, suffer ridiculous schedules or put up with inhuman working conditions: well, that’s when things get tricky.
BUT HANG ON, IN THE CONTROL FREAK ARTICLE, YOU TOLD ME TO MAKE A SCHEDULE!
Yes, we did. And we still think you should. And here’s where we come to the tricky part of creativity. It isn’t black and white. It’s not a case of write or don’t write. It’s not about a binary choice between scheduling or not scheduling. You need to find a place between those two states that works for you and for your creative flow.
Yes, you should commit to your creativity. No, you should not neglect your happiness, your joy or your health for your writing. Creativity doesn’t exist in a separate box from life. Creativity is life. The approaches we are applying to our creativity are the same rules that we can apply to have a happier, healthier life. And just as in life, creativity requires us to have balance.
MAKING GREAT TIME DOWN THE WRONG ROUTE
Another thing about Tyrant is that it doesn’t actually care whether the journey you are on is the right one for you. Its sole focus is to get to the finish line – any finish line – and get that thing checked off your To Do list.
And when Tyrant Gremlin has your creativity in a headlock, then your creativity can’t tell you where it wants to go next. Tyrant will override your creative instincts and determine what it thinks is the fastest, more expedient route. The sad thing is, there’s just no way a Gremlin has a better idea for your creative project than your actual creativity does! And in trying to control it, in listening to Tyrant, you’re cutting yourself off from the greatest supply of joy, inspiration and power that you possess.
Indeed, you may find yourself relentlessly sticking with a project, even when all the joy has gone out if it, and risk turning into an ‘art-martyr’, slaving away on a story that long ago lost its spark, whilst your muse is waving at you from elsewhere, wishing you would come to play on the real project that would fill you with true creative joy.
HOW DO I KNOW IF THE TYRANT IS DRIVING, OR IF IT’S JUST HARD BECAUSE WRITING IS HARD?
This is one of the most difficult and most nuanced things you will ever learn as a creative person. We wish it was as simple as, “always finish what you start” or, “give up when it gets hard.” But, as we’ve already said, writing isn’t black and white.
Very often, we will hit a pain barrier with our writing and want to go and do something else. (See The Procrastination Gremlin.)
But sometimes the opposite happens. We forget to listen to our creativity, and become too rigid, too determined to stick with a project no matter what. So, how will you know which is which?
The only way to know is through experience. We are not suggesting that you’ll be able to discern this on your first creative venture, or even your fifth, or 10th. But eventually, you’ll start to see patterns developing. The more you work with your creativity, the more you will be able to discern whether the voice in your head telling you to carry on is your Tyrant or your creativity.
GETTING PAST THE TYRANT GREMLIN
If you’ve read the previous articles, then you might have noticed that the attitude of the Tyrant Gremlin is basically the opposite of the voice of creativity. It might sound unglamorous and maybe even boring, but while your Tyrant wants you to burn through the night and go out in a blaze of glory, your creativity is asking you to plod, plod, plod. Steady, loving, step-by-step progress might look like nothing much while you’re doing it, but will culminate in incredible (and solid) results.
It might also help to remember what our ultimate goal is here. As humans, we are driven to create, to understand more about ourselves and the world we live in through creative expression. There is no end point or product to this process – it’s its own goal, a virtuous circle.
We come to know ourselves more deeply through our creative endeavours. And our creative endeavours are richer for our exploration of ourselves. We plod, because the path to awareness, understanding and authenticity are also the destination.
Another thing that can help with plodding is wood-chopping our goals down into really tiny ones. We know that Tyrant loves a grand gesture. It wants you to finish that novel now! If not sooner. But creativity (a tortoise at heart) is happy taking small steps.
So, redirect your Tyrant. Tell it that you’re the one in control and actually, the mission has changed. The end goal isn’t to finish this piece of work by devoting every scrap of energy you’ve got. It is to develop and maintain a regular work practice that will allow you to create happily and healthily for a long, long time.
This is an abridged excerpt from Seven Creative Gremlins: Write your way through doubt and fear to claim your creative life by Nicola Jackson and Teresa Wilson. Find it here for £1.99 ebook/£6.99 paperback.
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