Hello there,
Earlier this week, I talked about the value of space and silence and how that can help your creativity communicate with you.
If you want to deepen your relationship with creativity and with yourself, then I would recommend adding in a journalling practice.
Some of you might already do this, regularly or sporadically. Some might never have tried. ‘But what do you write?’ people who have never journalled sometimes ask. And my answer to that is, ‘whatever is in my head at that moment in time.’
We don’t realise how much clutter we are holding in our minds until we articulate it on the page. I don’t mean eloquently. I mean a blurt of messy thoughts, complaints, worries and dreams, half-formed, perhaps nonsensical or contradictory, but all the better for being aired.
No one is every going to publish my journals. (And not only because I shred them once a notebook is filled.) They’re not art. They’re not impressive. They’re not meant for anyone else. They are a conversation with myself (or sometimes a conversation with creativity itself, I’m not above sending a complaint directly to the source!)
The words you get down in a journal are the daily, repetitive conversations you dream of having, that you need to have, but that no other person has the time to participate in. I mean, sure, your family and friends love you – but no-one has that much time or patience. No-one except you and creativity.
(Those who have read The Artist’s Way will be familiar with the concept of Morning Pages. if you haven’t read this book, it’s a useful guide to getting back in touch with your creative self.)
Attention is one of the most precious (and rare) things in the world. Increasingly, we fight for attention from others, in person but especially online. Spend any time on social media and the plea is clear- notice me, listen to me, see me. But there are thousands of posts whooshing past every minute. It is very challenging to get noticed in any meaningful way.
Actual real life (or Zoom) conversations with other creative types are incredibly valuable, of course. They can be a wonderful reality check and are another thing to add to your creative life where possible.
But whatever your situation, you need never feel neglected or not listened to. Every day, you have the opportunity to give yourself half an hour of precious, golden attention, writing down your thoughts and hopes and fears in a journal. Telling yourself that you, and what is going on with you, matters.
After all, you can’t exactly resent no-one giving you attention if you can’t even be bothered to give it to yourself can you?
I use an A4 spiral bound notepad and a fountain pen. The same notepads, the same pen every time. For me, handwriting makes a connection that typing on a laptop doesn’t. But you can experiment and find your own way.
My journal entries often start with, ‘Okay, so…’ and then I will reel off what’s bugging me, where I am up to, what I am hoping for, what I am stuck on. Sometimes as I write I will untangle a knot or two – in life or creativity. Sometimes I won’t. But I always get the relief of having listened to myself. As writers, often we don’t understand what we want, or how we feel, until we have formed it into words.
So, if you find yourself feeling neglected, or overlooked, or just in need of a listening ear but there seems to be no-one around you can talk to, then turn to the person who is always available to you, and who, deep down, knows what is best for you above all others.
You are the person whose attention you need the most.
Nicola x